April 20th, 2026 - A Private View

Dear TNY,

“A Private View” is the fodder for today.

And…drumroll please…who cares.  This shit is bad.

I’m not sure who the audience is for this.  It isn’t anyone I want to know.  There’s just nothing here.  It’s all so superficial.  There’s no fucking grit.  I tried so hard to keep reading and just ended up skimming.

Enough about that shit.

Nothing new on my end.  I have not become a robot yet.  My emotions are still full swing (although for nerve pain I am now taking an antidepressant which is supposed to reduce the pain, lower my libido, and make it difficult to ejaculate; jokes on me because the nerve pain is only slightly diminished, my libido is increased, and I can’t come!).  I spent the last week living with a friend up near Port Townsend.  Pretty routine days.  Each day I got more sad, though.  They, you know, them, they keep saying that it’s going to get better.  It doesn’t.  It’s actually getting worse.  And I’ve said this before but I’m saying it again, people are tired of hearing about it so I’m just not saying it anymore.  But it doesn’t mean I don’t think about it every waking moment. 

When you figure out what you are supposed to do with your life, it’s all you want to do.  And when you can’t do it…despair.

That’s it.  That’s all I’ve got.

Nick